Ken Ichijouji and the Mystery of the Missing Matt
by Chryseis Fett
Summary: Matt has gone missing! Can Ken the Detective find him?
1. The Office

Ken Ichijouji and the Mystery of the Missing Matt

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written by Yolei Ichijouji, as told by her darling Kenny

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Twenty-five years after the defeat of Malomyotismon...

The name's Ichijouji. Ken Ichijouji. Private eye. My partner Wormmon and I just got back from one of the most shocking cases of our lives--the disappearance of Yamato Ishida.

It was a boring evening, as usual. The only jobs we had had for days were looking for Mimi's missing jewelry and cosmetics. And that wasn't the worst part--she didn't even pay us! Figures.

"Well, Ken," Wormmon said to me, "this is safer than staying home."

I laughed. "Isn't that the truth?"

My wife was a bit short tempered. Whenever she lost it, it was Wormmon's fault--yet I always got blamed. You'd think I'd have broke up with my partner by now, but I could never stay mad at Wormmon.

As I was saying, it was a very boring evening. Just then, the door to our office swung open. A tall lady with short brown hair stepped in.

"Mr. Ichijouji!" she cried. "I need your help!"

It was none other than my childhood friend, Sora Ishida.

"What's wrong, Mrs. Ishida?" I asked.

She sniffled. "It's my husband! He's gone!"

Matt? Gone? This was serious! I tried to stay cool.

"Don't worry, Mrs. Ishida. I'll find your husband."

"Oh, thank you, Ken!" she cried, running up to my desk and hugging me. I squirmed slightly, but tried to remain polite. Wormmon, however, did not take the same approach as me.

"That's Mr. Ichijouji to you," the caterpillar digimon said angrily. "And keep your hands off my partner!" She glared at him, but let go.

"I'll get to work on the case right away," I said to Sora, trying to get her to leave as quickly as possible. If my darling Miyako found out another woman had touched me...well, I just wouldn't let her find out.

"Thank you, Mr. Ichijouji," she said, and left abruptly, glaring at Wormmon, who just glared right back.

"Ken," my partner said after Sora was gone, "I don't think I like her anymore. Ever since you and Yolei got married, she's been acting funny around you."

"Wormmon!" I scolded him, "Matt and Sora are very happy together!" Wormmon stuck his nose up in the air.

"Come on, Wormmon," I said finally, "let's get going." 


	2. The Ishida Residence

The first place we inspected was the Ishida residence. It took me a bit of persuading to get Sora to let Wormmon in, but we were finally granted entrance. "Mrs. Ishida, where did your husband spend the most time?"

"His 'Forbidden Room'," she responded. "No one was allowed in there but him. The whole thing was very hush-hush."

"Wormmon," I exclaimed, "this is our first clue!" Sora led us to the room and we entered. She stayed outside, afraid to break the rule.

"Ken," Wormmon said in shock, "this place is a mess! It looks even worse than our kitchen at home!" I winced at the reminder.

"I guess that's what happens when a man's wife doesn't get to clean regularly. We're lucky to have Yolei around." Wormmon stared at me.

I shuffled my feet uncomfortably. "Well, let's get started." The two of us split up. The first place I checked was the tool chest. It turned out to be full of guitar parts. I was shifting through them, in search of a clue, when Wormmon interrupted me. 

"Uh, Ken, you'd better look at this," he said. I turned around.

"Oh, my gosh," I whispered. The wall was covered in posters of women. None of them were Sora. I studied the posters in curiosity. They turned out to be mostly of actresses, but a few I recognized personally.

"Let's see, there's the former Hikari Kamiya; oh, and there's Mimi! Wait a minute, what's Mimi doing on Matt's wall?" I decided not to think about it anymore and moved to the next poster.

"Yolei?!?" I exclaimed in horror.

"Ken, maybe we should look somewhere else," Wormmon said in an effort to distract me.

"But my darling Miyako's picture is on Matt's wall!" I whimpered. Then another emotion came over me. "I'm gonna kill that Matt Ishida!" I shouted.

Wormmon had to drag me out of the room. Luckily, something caught my eye before we left.

"Wormmon, there's something sticking out from under the rug!"

My digimon partner pulled it out. "Ken, this is a brochure of Mars!"

"Mars? Why would he want to go to Mars?" I asked.

Wormmon nodded his head toward the posters. "Maybe he isn't happy at home. Yeah, maybe Matt and Sora aren't as perfectly matched as you and Yolei!" He smiled proudly at his sudden revelation.

"That could be possible," I admitted. "Well, let's go to Mars!"

"Mars?" Wormmon squeaked. "But I don't like to travel!"

"Wormmon, it'll be fun!" I said. "We're going, and that's final!"


	3. Mars

When we arrived at the station, we were lucky to find a shuttle getting ready to take off. We quickly bought two seats in the cargo hold. With business as it had been, we couldn't seem to afford anything better.

"Ken," Wormmon moaned, "why are there chickens back here?" He was hard to hear over the obnoxious clucking sounds of the birds.

"Maybe Martians like to eat eggs," I suggested.

"That's what I like about you, Ken," he returned. "You're so smart!"

"I'm not just smart," I said proudly, "I'm a genius!"

"YOU IDIOTS!" a familiar voice roared. The two of us jumped.

"Matt!" I exclaimed as he strode angrily into view. "What are you doing here?" He fumed.

"I'm trying to get away from Sora!" he shouted at us. "What do you think you're doing?!?"

"We're trying to bring you home to Sora," Wormmon answered innocently.

"WHAT?!?" Matt roared again. "Did you ever THINK that maybe I didn't WANT to be found?!?"

"Uh, no?" I answered honestly.

"Apparently that haircut had more of an effect on you IQ than we had first thought!" Matt yelled. I whimpered.

"We're sorry! Please don't hurt us!" the two of us begged, hugging each other in terror. Matt rolled his eyes.

"Don't worry," he said, calming down. I instantly regained my cool.

I stood up, smoothing my trenchcoat to give a more professional appearance. "Mr. Ishida," I started, "your wife is worried sick about you! You should be ashamed!"

"Are you kidding?" Matt asked in disbelief. "I had thought you would've wanted to sneak to Mars with me!"

"Why would I want to do that?" I asked. Wormmon and Matt stared.

"Um, your wife?" Matt suggested. "She's, uh, a bit, um..."

"What we're trying to say, Ken," Wormmon interrupted, "is that Yolei is really, really--"

"Shut up!" I shouted, seeing where they were going. "How dare you talk about my darling Miyako like that?!?" Wormmon shuddered.

"Sorry, Ken," Matt said. "I didn't mean to insult you.

"That's okay," I said. I couldn't stay mad at Matt either.

"Do you understand why I came to Mars?" Matt asked.

"Yeah," I answered. "Sora's scary!"

"Exactly!" Matt exclaimed. "I'd rather be with Mimi than with her!"

"Really?" I asked in amazement. He thought about it for a while.

"No, I was wrong; I would rather be dead than be with Mimi."

Well, the mystery was solved. Matt stayed on Mars, soon to be joined by Tai, who was also running away from his wife. After taking the next shuttle back to Earth, I visited the Ishida residence once more.

"Did you find him?" Sora asked frantically.

"Nope, not a trace. He's gone for good." She wailed and ran into the house, slamming the door behind her.

Wormmon and I headed home.

"Uh, Ken?" Wormmon asked as we got closer to the house. "Are you sure you don't want to go to Mars with Tai and Matt?"

"Why would I want to do that?"

"No reason," Wormmon whimpered.

"KEN!!!" Yolei screamed as we walked through the door. "Get to work! This house is a mess! Look at my linoleum!" Then, remembering that we had no linoleum (stupid Davis!), she ran into the bathroom and cried.

"Well, Wormmon, looks like everything's back to normal," I said. Wormmon nodded sadly. 

The phone rang. "Maybe it's another case!" Wormmon shouted eagerly. He picked up the phone.

"Ichijouji residence," the digimon said.

"KEN!!! I NEED YOUR HELP!!!" Mimi screamed.

It was going to be another one of those nights.

THE END

(or is it?) 


End file.
